I’m not a good New Years resolution maker. Count me in with the 88% of people who fail each year. Changing patterns is hard, and abruptly changing patterns is even harder. I stink at it.
You’d think I’d give up, but I still love the natural timing of making intentions in the new year. It’s a poignant time to pause…to reconsider, assess, and tweak. As I get older, “tweaking” (not to be confused with twerking) is more my speed. I’ve crafted a big, beautiful life that I love, but we change and evolve, and what might have served us in the past no longer might. So instead of die-hard resolutions, I look at this as a time to decide what to tweak…what I want more of in my life, and what I want less of. A “tuning up”, so to speak.
Which brings me to my tweaks…in no particular order.
1. Travel more. It’s funny – when I was younger and decidedly less financially stable, I traveled the country. I guess I had less obligations and was more keen to drop everything and trek across the country on a shoestring budget. Two favorite memories of my life are the long cross-country road trips I took 10 years ago and 5 years ago. Traveling and being outside of my normal life makes me feel fresh and alive. It feeds my spirit of adventure, which honestly is a little neglected these days while we happily take care of twin toddlers. Having little ones is an adventure in its own right, of course, but I’ve always loved traveling, and I intend to do more of this in 2015.
2. Move my body more. Ugh. Just ugh. I am not a naturally athletic type. I’ve never been into sports, or the gym, or..well, anything more athletic than turning the pages of a good book. But, now I don’t have the power of youth on my side, and it’s just flat-out time to take care of my body. I’m not looking forward to this, and in fact I kind of resent it, but it doesn’t matter. It has to be done. And with any luck, I’ll learn to enjoy it. My mantra this year is “Some kind of activity, most days.” Walking, riding bikes with the boys, doing some yoga on DVD, maybe even some crappily-played tennis. Doesn’t matter what it is, it just needs to happen. Need to work the cobwebs out of these joints, cause they truly are getting kind of rusty. And even if I don’t want to do it for me, I want to be around as long as possible for my children. So, time to smack some balls on the court.
3. Less “yesses”. Last year, I went to a blogging conference. One of the keynotes talked about how it’s just as important to know what to say “yes” to as it is to know when to say “no”. It’s easy to say no to things we don’t want to do. Saying no to things we WANT to do is harder. The emotional energy and time we can spend on things is limited. We simply can not do everything we want. We have to choose or else we end up doing things half-assed. This is the story of my life. I’m a passionate Leo, and throw myself into things I care about. I start out with the best of intentions, but after a while, I putter out, because I just have too much on my plate. I realize this will always be the case, but this year, I intend to be careful about what I say “yes” to. Just because I want to do something, doesn’t mean I should. Turning things down that we want to do is a grown-up thing to do.
4. Less social media. Oh dear. I love Facebook. And I also hate Facebook. It’s a way to stay connected with people, for sure, and to share the things in my life that I love and am passionate about. But, it’s also overwhelming. It’s not just a time suck – it’s an energy suck. When I’m too plugged in, I’m distracted from my life that’s right in front of me. In 2015 I have to be more present in my own life, and the lives of my close friends. I have to unplug in some places, and social media will be one of them. I’ve already started making this shift.
5. More time for hobbies. Hobbies is such an understated word. It kind of trivializes what it really means – paying attention to your passions. The things that fill you up. That make you feel so grateful to be alive. I love reading, cooking, crafting, entertaining, traveling and writing. These are the things that make me feel content. Like I could never get enough of them. This year, I intend to have a special emphasis on traveling and writing.
6. Less TV. I really have nothing against tv. It’s a great vice to have. But, having children, the only time I have for aforementioned hobbies is at night. Something’s got to give. So, less The Good Wife and more of the things that make me feel peaceful. It’s been fun Alicia, Kalinda and Will. Until we meet again…
7. More writing. I used to write voluminously. I was decent at it and enjoyed getting my thoughts down on paper. As I’ve gotten older, my writing has fallen to the wayside. This blog has been my humble attempt at nurturing that part of myself , but I’d like to do more. I’ve always had a dream of becoming published. (Scary words to put out in the universe.) I’ve never thought I had enough talent, but I just had the most amazing conversation with a dear friend a few months ago. She said something pretty profound, that I think about almost every day. That when we were younger, she used to think that authors were published because they were extremely gifted. Now, she realizes that if you have just a modicum of talent, and extreme disclipline, you can get published. Many of the published authors out there have no more talent than us – they just have extreme discipline. I just think this is brilliant. And terrifying, since I have no disclipline. Hence, my New Years tweaking.
7. More money. I believe in the power of intention, so I’m just going to put it out there. 2015 needs to have more money rolling around. Stephanie and I are very fortunate, but there are experiences that I’d love to be able to create with my family, and those experiences require money. Good sums of it.
8. More babies. Yep, I mean it. Stephanie and I would love to welcome a little brother or sister for August and Liam in 2015. We got pregnant with the twins the first week of January in 2012, and we will be continuing our fertility journey this year. I so hope that it will be a part of our family’s story to have at least one more baby.
So there you have it. My tweaks for the year ahead. Slight changes that I hope will make a big impact in our family’s lives.
Happy New Year everyone! Would love to hear about the changes you have in mind for you and your family…